Fully Alive MarriageSample

Fighting Your Marriage on Your Knees

Your spouse is not your enemy. But your relationship does have an enemy—Satan and his kingdom of darkness. The only effective strategy against evil and what the enemy desires to do in destroying your marriage is to remain on your knees.

Here are five ways to pray that align with what God is doing in you, your spouse, and your relationship.

1. Jesus, HELP!

You can’t do this on your own. Since your marriage is the union of two sinners, you know that without Jesus’ presence, you’re sunk.

Ask Him to intervene, to do what only He can do. Invite Him right into the middle of your messy marriage. Don’t try to micromanage Him or grasp for a specific outcome. Let Him do His work.

2. Jesus, what’s going on here?

How helpful this prayer will be! Hearing Jesus’ answer to this question can take you out of your emotional quagmire and shine a light on the next step you are to take.

Your marriage struggles might echo family-of-origin patterns, a lack of needed skills, or the reflection of immaturity. They might also be a more direct assault from the kingdom of darkness. If so, your soul can become stirred to more direct spiritual warfare, such as pleading the blood of Jesus.

3. Jesus, how do You see my spouse’s heart?

If your spouse has an evil heart, you will need to respond differently than if they are acting out of pain or simply lacking good models to learn from.

Seeing your spouse’s heart from God’s perspective helps you feel compassion for them as God does. Compassion doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but it brings you more clarity in knowing what to do next.

4. Jesus, how do You see my heart?

Remember, you’re a sinner here too. Jesus never looks at you with condemnation but with honesty and compassion. He sees the ways you’ve been sinned against and the ways you’ve sinned in response.

Asking Jesus to search your heart and show you how He sees you, can leave you feeling vulnerable. Do it anyway. Your heart can be safe with Him.

5. Jesus, what next step do You need me to take?

Cooperating with God means God works, and we work. In building a fully alive marriage, there will always be steps God needs you to take. What are they?

This is not running ahead of God, trying to control the outcome. Neither is it sitting back and waiting for God to do everything. Sometimes the steps He needs you to take are in your heart and sometimes in how you relate to your spouse.

Ask these questions and then wait quietly in His presence for Jesus to answer. This will prove invaluable as you build a fully alive marriage.