Sex In Marriage: The Basics - Part 2Sample

Recreation and Release

The online dictionary defines recreation as, “activity done for enjoyment when one is not working.” The origin of the Latin root is “create again, renew.” Lay that template over your marital sexual relationship and it paints a really nice picture. I think it helps us get past some of the things that keep us from embracing the fullness of the sexual relationship that God intended for us to have in marriage. When we stop and think about how God created us male and female and how a man and woman fit perfectly together, it is easy to see sex as an activity of enjoyment. God gave us sensory receptors in our bodies that add to the experience. How the myth ever got started that God has a negative view of sex in marriage baffles me. At creation, God purposely created our bodies to experience each other, male and female, in very close, personal, and intimate ways. The recreation part of sex truly renews us in the process.

Let’s look at what the dictionary has to say about release. The definition as a verb is “to allow or enable to escape from confinement; to set free.” Isn’t that what sex in marriage was designed to give us? Didn’t God want us to have this unashamed freedom with each other? This is the picture of what we as Christian couples need to experience. We need to be free from the world’s definition of sex and to embrace God’s plan. I have counseled so many people that have been confined by their past sexual experiences. Whether it is abuse, pornography, cultural influences, rigid teaching, or something else, they need to be released from the past in order to be free to enjoy all God has for them in their marriage. It’s like a bird that was never meant to live in a cage finally being set free.  

Is there anything that is holding you back? Anything that hinders you from embracing the recreation part of sex in your marriage? What about release? What keeps you from being set free? God’s plan for sex in marriage is not complicated. It is actually very simple. It’s a man and a woman coming together in a mingling of souls. Now that is great sex!

Today’s Challenge: 

What does it mean to you to have “freedom” in the sexual relationship in your marriage?

Going Deeper:

1. What do you enjoy the most in your sexual relationship in marriage?

2. Dr. Kim talks about the explicit nature of the sexual relationship as revealed in the Song of Solomon. Why do you think God included this book in the Bible?

3. If the sexual relationship is truly a gift from God, what keeps you from fully embracing it in your marriage?

4. Will you commit to read Song of Solomon together?