Gentleness

Frederick Buechner is one of my favorite writers. Here is his definition of "anger":

Of the Seven Deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back—in many ways it is a feast fit for a king. The chief drawback is that what you are wolfing down is yourself. The skeleton at the feast is you.

Now we come to the fruit of the Spirit called "gentleness." 

This term translates praus, one of the truly great words in the Greek language. No one English word adequately describes this Greek word.

Aristotle gave the word its classic definition: the man who is always angry at the right time and never at the wrong time. It describes someone who controls his or her emotions no matter the circumstances. 

Plato used it to describe the power to soothe and calm, as an ointment on a wound. Socrates used it for a man who could discuss emotional things without losing his temper.

The Righteous Anger—And Gentleness—Of God

Our holy King has every right to condemn each of us for our sins. 

Instead, He is angry at our sins but forgives us when we confess them (1 John 1:9) and forgets all He forgives (Isaiah 43:25). 

Now he calls us to manifest such praus with each other.

Gentleness is one of the greatest hallmarks of a life led by the Holy Spirit:

• "Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious" (1 Peter 3:4).


• "Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness" (Galatians 6:1).


• "The Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness" (2 Timothy 2:24–25).


• We are to defend our faith "with gentleness and respect" (1 Peter 3:15).


• "Walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness" (Ephesians 4:1–2).

When you cannot be forgiving and gentle, know that the Spirit can do what you cannot.

Apply the lesson

• When last did you get angry? Was it fun? Did you regret it after the fact? How could you have handled the situation differently?


• Whom do you know who controls their emotions regardless of the situation? How do you perceive that person? Do you see that as a strength or weakness?


• How have you walked in “all humility and gentleness” in the last week?


• Why is gentleness one quality of a civil person? Put another way: How does gentleness cause an uncivil person to react?